It's baccccccccck! I took this list to Facebook when I left Live Journal a few years ago. I updated it mid-March but added a few more things to the list since then. So without further ado, my list of 225 things you may or may not want to know about me. (updated 03/15/2009)
This list is 6 years in the making and I add new things every year--some of the things may seem gloomy but don't worry I'm a happy well adjusted person now. :-) THIS LIST IS ALSO SUPER FILTERED SO WHAT GOES ON IN Live Journal--STAYS IN Live Journal.
1. When I was a kid I would often dream of faking my own death. I wondered what it would be like to go to my own funeral and see if anyone really did give a damn about me. I'd even go so far as to dream of what it would be like to come back after 25 years and extract some sort of revenge on the people that made my life a living hell growing up.
2. A random closeted gay kid with multiple sclerosis calls me on the phone every six months or so to talk. Somehow he got my phone number after seeing my website. He just calls to talk because he doesn't know anyone else like him (i.e. gay). He can't even say the word. I haven't heard from him in about a year and since I lost my old phone I wonder and hope he's safe and happy.
3. I love rollercoaster's. When I go to amusement parks I ride them all day long. My old best friend Jared and I spent the whole day on the Superman coaster a few summers ago and screamed Mommie Dearest quotes every time we went down the first incline. We always sat in the last car and screamed, people on the ride thought we were mentally ill.
4. I'm drawn to people with broken souls or people with doomed outlooks on life. I will do everything in my power to cheer them up and/or "fix" them. I think it helps me to overcome my own damage to help someone else.
5. When I was little I had the biggest crush on Joyce Dewitt. When she cried in the last episode of Three's Company I felt dead inside.
6. I've helped four blind people cross the street since I've been living in Boston, twice while I was still talking on my cell phone.
7. I always got a "U" in "uses time wisely" on my report card in elementary school. I used get severe cases of the giggles. I'd spend all day trying to make all the girls laugh. Even when the teacher was furiously yelling at me to stop laughing, I'd still be giggling with tears in my eyes unable to stop.
8. My fifth grade teacher was the first African American I'd ever spoken to. She scared the fuck out of me. No not because she was black, she was just stern.
9. When I was a young teenager the courts forced us to spend visitation time with my father. He only did things he liked to do and he never really wanted to spend time with us, my Grammy put him up to it. We'd always end up fishing, which I hated. Whenever he'd take us out on his boat, I'd always fantasize about pushing him overboard and driving away.
10. I used to play doctor with a neighbor kid behind the shed in our yard. His older brother found out and always threatened to expose me. I was terrified he'd tell people we were gay, although I didn't know what gay were when I was 10.
11. I have a Dr. Marlena Evans Brady Black (of Days of our Lives) Barbie doll in the original packaging in the back of my closet. It was a gag gift from my best friend Joel.
12. I had (2) one hundred page photo albums full of stickers when I was in elementary school. I was obsessed with owning every "Lisa Frank" sticker on the planet. My sister destroyed them all when I was in high school. I could have killed her.
13. When I was 17 I drove my car into a van load of Samoans in a snow storm in the mountains. They got out of their car, grunted and got back in and drove away. My car had about $4000.00 worth of damage to it. I told my mom I never wanted to drive again so she'd feel bad and not ground me for life. Teenagers are so manipulative.
14. I was always the funniest kid in class until the fourth grade when I realized I had a crush on this boy named Timothy. I became so paranoid people would find out I was afraid to look him in the eye. It's been that way with cute guys ever since.
15. When I was 17 my nana hung a sign at the Senior Center and talked all her friends into letting me mow their lawns. I made a lot of money that summer. It was cool because I'd mow their lawn for 30 minutes and then spend three hours talking to them. Most seniors just want someone to talk to. I wish I could volunteer for something like that but no one has lawns in the city.
16. My parents got a cat when I was a very young. I named it "Kitty". When it slept in my crib I thought its tail was separately alive from its body because its body would always be asleep and the tail would still move. I used to walk Kitty on a leash (with fake rhinestones on the collar) through the ghetto of Malden with my mom when I was young. I took the cat everywhere with me. It was my most prized possession.
17. My mother got married and had me when she was 17. When she finished High School we moved to the ghetto in Malden. I learned to walk on a floor that was sloped. We eventually moved out because the building was condemned and demolished.
18. One of my earliest memories is making gingerbread men in our old kitchen with my mom when I was two. I got to press the m&m's for eyes into each cookie. Whenever I smell gingerbread I remember how happy I was.
19. I don't like green candy. Subconsciously I think it tastes like the leaves of the different fruits that are represented in the bag.
20. I once stole a Playgirl from Walden Books in the Billerica Mall and felt so guilty I threw it in a dumpster on the way home before I could "read" it.
21. I put a semester of my high school best friend's college tuition on my credit card because she only had two days to pay it or she wouldn't graduate. She promised me she'd pay me back within a month. It took her two years. I was pissed about it for a long time but I eventually. I recently reconnected with her and totally forgot all about that until I just re-read this now.
22. My dead Nana came to me in my sleep and woke me up a few days after she died. She whispered something in my ear and it almost drove me mad for days because I couldn't remember what it was that she said to me but I knew it would change my life. To this day I have no idea what she said.
23. Since my Nana's death, whenever I do something, I assume my Nana is watching over me and I think, would she be proud of this or that decision?
24. I loathed appointed President Bush. I mean I physically get/got upset when I see his smirking face. I think if someone assassinated him, I may actually laugh.
25. I used to ride on the back of my Dad's motorcycle when I was five years old. He would belt me to him and I'd grab onto him as hard as I could. I felt like hot shit riding down the highway as other cars would look out their windows and see how cool I was.
26. I've saved every movie stub from every movie I've ever seen since I was 18. I keep them in an antique tea caddy in my media room.
27. I didn't go to my prom. I went to the after-party with my only friend in high school, Rhonda Smith. When she was across the hall drinking with her friends I was in our room watching that puppet sitcom Madame eating soft-batch cookies by myself. That about sums up my High School experience.
28. I didn't have my first drink of alcohol until I was 24 years old. It was a White Russian. I got totally trashed on that one drink at the old Chaps with Ed Luciano, one of Joel's best friends at the time. Ironically I learned years later that that was my mother's favorite drink.
29. I had my first kiss when I was 18 with my first boyfriend Frank Mancini. It happened in my car outside of a club where I had met him for the second time. We were together for about two years.
30. When I was 8 my childhood best friend Michelle Bruce peer-pressured me into writing a fan letter to Olivia Newton John. She wrote me back and sent a signed autograph which I hid in my room because I was embarrassed by it.
31. I smashed all my Match Box cars in the street with rocks when I was a kid. I kept them all in a bucket. My favorite car was this gold Buick because my Grammy always drove a Buick.
32. I secretly blamed my little sister's miscarriage on my little brother because she was going through a really difficult time when he was going through a really difficult time and I felt he was burdening her. I'm over it now but I didn't speak to him for a year. I think I just needed someone tangible to blame for such a senseless tragedy.
33. I use architectural nine's, like this "9". People always ask me what they are.
34. I love to bake. When I was a kid I used to let my brothers and sister help me make whoopee pies. We'd giggle and make the biggest messes with the powdered sugar. We always made extra filling to eat out of the bowl after we made them.
35. I once made a time capsule with a friend as a kid and we put a dead mouse in the capsule. We opened it three months later and we were convinced we may had gotten rabies because we touched all the things that touched the dead mouse.
36. When I was a teenager I used to keep a scrap-book of anything related to the soap opera Santa Barbara. I kept it hidden under my bed so no one would know about it. I regrettably threw it away in college.
37. I used to tape my favorite shows and make my mom watch them to see if she would laugh at all the parts I thought were funny. I'd always explain why it was funny. I wanted so much for her to like me.
38. Growing up I desperately wanted my mother's affection. She got mad at me one time and said I was just "like my father"--a man we all knew was the epitome of a failure in her eyes. I think that was the day I began to hate her and myself for many many years. We're good now.
39. When I came out to my mother she sent me a letter in the mail cutting me out of her life. She explained in explicate detail how I would die of AIDS, listing all the symptoms in explicate detail. I wanted to die. We didn't speak for almost five years. She later confided in me her best friend was gay and she had to watch him die of AIDS--she reacted instinctively in a warmped way to save me.
40. I've fallen in love with five of my best male friends and one female friend. I'm still friends with all of the guys but it's not the same.
41. When I worked at this nightclub Quest for three months I tried to get one kid to quit smoking, I tried to get one kid off drugs and I tried to get one kid to quit this escort service he worked for.
42. Growing up, my mother used to drink alone in her room with the door locked. One time she was drinking when I cracked my head open. I had to pound on the door like a crazy person because she was locked in her room. I could barely see because my eyes were filled with blood from the injury.
43. Sometimes I can read peoples thoughts or make them think things and get them to say them. It's beyond creepy. I mean it's not mind control but I just think something to myself and then they say it.
44. I had a severe sleeping disorder when I was a child. I'd wake up in the strangest places, not having any memory of how I got there. I once woke up behind our washing machine, in the shed behind our house, in my neighbor's basement and in a closet in my room.
45. When my Nana died I was so overcome with tears that I almost slipped on some mud and fell into her open grave. (It was pouring rain.) My uncle caught me.
46. I received a $250.00 scholarship for college from the family of a boy who lost their son in a ski mobile accident.
47. I called my previous boss a "stupid bitch" to her face and told her to take "her job and shove it" when she fired my best friend Joel. She told me to take two days off and gave me a raise and a promotion. I eventually worked my way up to office manager before getting fired for contemplating starting my own company. (That's a long story.)
48. I was mugged three times in the first six months I lived in the city. They never got any money from me. The first time he had a gun. The second time he had a knife. The third time it was three kids who surrounded me. Each time I either fought them off or outsmarted them. I had as little as $3.00 in my pocket one time and as much as $650.00 from my recently cashed pay check in my pocket another.
49. My father used to beat us with this club of wood he widdled out of a log on a camping trip. He called it "The Fish" and its tail was the handle. Its body was the brunt of force. It was about 12" long by 3" wide and about an inch thick. He used to hide it in the bottom of the towel closet. When my mom threw him out we burned it.
50. I believe in love at first sight and it's happened to me 8 times. (Edited)
51. My little brother Michael had rage issues when we were kids. I once locked him in the basement to stop him from beating up my siblings and he put a hammer through the door trying to get out. My mom blamed me. When you're the oldest, they always blame you.
52. I kissed my female office assistant on the dance floor at Avalon while we were dancing; we never mentioned it the next day.
53. My best friend Toni in the 7th grade pretended to write me love letters so I could break up with Jen Bennett, my 7th grade girlfriend.
54. When I was a kid we had a huge Weeping Willow in our front yard; when the city removed it I threw some of my toys in the big hole to see if they would bury them. They did.
55. A fat girl in the 2nd grade forced me to kiss her on the playground behind the building at school. I hated her but I was afraid she'd kick my ass because she was like 6" taller than me.
56. I'm gay but I occasionally like to kiss girls when I'm drunk because it's different/funny/crazy.
57. I made a new friend once who innocently (or not so innocently) brought me a cookie in a bag to a gay bar and gave it to me in front of my (then) boyfriend. It was very random but in a cool way. The boyfriend was not pleased. I still have that cookie frozen in my freezer. If I could press it into a memory book I probably would. I love random shit like that.
58. The weirdest thing anyone has every mailed me from the internet was an autographed program for Charles Nelson Reilly's one man show on Broadway. I heart it.
59. I once sent a friend who was depressed flowers anonymously from secret admirer to cheer him up.
60. A caught an internet "friend" who was staying with me writing down my social security number and put it in his luggage. I went into his luggage and took it back and threw it out when he left the room. He then came back and took it back before he left from the trash. When I called him on it days later he said it was because he never wanted to lose touch with me. I really believe that was the reason.
61. I've thought about leaving my condo in my will to someone who would never expect to get it but has left a profound impact on my life. That person changes every six months or so.
62. Someone I consider a soul mate is married to someone else but I'm honestly happy he is because I'd never be able to make him happy and I'd possibly lose the friendship. This isn't about sex, it's about a connection.
63. I'm not as bitter or angry as I pretend to be sometimes, it's just amusing and I like to make people laugh. I think my friend Jeff Yantch is the same way.
64. I've promised myself that if I don't meet the one by the time I'm 35 I'm going to either find a surrogate or adopt a child, preferably from birth. I'm turning 36 in 2009. :-(
65. In high school I secretly jerked off while thinking about fucking the guys who made fun of me every day in school.
66. My mother gave away our dog as a child to a neighbor at the end of the street and told us he went to live on a farm. The house was on my paper route. Every time I delivered the paper the dog would run up to the fence all excited to see me.
67. I used to be a paperboy when I was a kid. I spent all the money on candy and soap opera magazines.
68. I once rolled over after sex in the morning with my (then) boyfriend and pulled a box of Drake's Funny Bones cakes out of the drawer and ate them in bed. He couldn't stop laughing. What? They're good. He still gives me shit about that to this day. It's like his favorite "Gary" story. Haha. "Remember that time you pulled snack cakes out of your bedside table after sex..."
69. I lost my virginity to someone who pretended he had cancer and then faked a suicide attempt so I wouldn't break up with him.
70. My favorite color used to be red when I was little but I'm pretty fond of brown and blue now. I love black in theory but it always gets dirty.
71. The most romantic environment I've ever been in where I didn't have sex was on a train from Paris to Vienna with my ex-boyfriend Jason aka "Monkey".
72. I've eaten a romantic dinner on top of the Eiffel tower. it was the first time I had prongs.
73. I've loved and lost (by my own hand) and lived to regret it.
74. My first boyfriend kicked my car door and threatened to out me to my mother because we had a fight and I was trying to leave. Oh Franka.
75. I've only had strawberries and whipped cream once and I didn't think it was very romantic.
76. I've always wanted to be a gymnast when I was a kid. I used to do flips and walk-over down the length of my street for attention.
77. I was totally in love with a neighborhood kid who was friends with me up until middle school. He had a fraternal twin; the twin was evil and hated me. He used to make fun of me in school and the good twin would just sit back in silence, paralyzed to say anything despite the fact that I could tell he wanted to stand up for me.
78. I've only been accepted wholeheartedly into a boyfriend's family once in my lifetime and it was possibly the most secure and validated I've ever felt in a relationship. I long to feel that again.
79. Watching an episode of Ellen can cheer me up no matter how sad or depressed I am.
80. I own three autographed books: Margaret Cho's I'm the One That I Want; Charles Shultz's A Dark and Stormy Night with Snoopy and the Peanuts Gang and Mary Tyler Moore's autobiography. Joel made me wait in line with him to get the MTM book.
81. The first time I went to New York alone I was propositioned for sex the second I left the Port Authority bus terminal. When I turned him down and said I wasn't a prostitute I asked him if "I looked liked a prostitute." and he said, "yes" because I was wearing a tight t-shirt and I was young. Apparently those are the only prerequisites.
82. I was once groped in the elevator in my office building by someone I don't know. He just "had" to feel my bicep.
83. I met one of my best friends John by asking him out while he was in line paying for their food at the Au Bon Pain in my office building. Everyone in lined cooed and he just blushed. In my defense I was overcome with confidence from a friend and I was high as a kite on St. John's wart. It was over in my mind when he fell asleep 10 minutes into our first date.
84. Some guy confided in me that their friend spilled a drink on a girlfriend of mine (twice), just so he could talk to me even though he knew I had a boyfriend.
85. I have a small scar right below my hairline from the time my neighbor hit me in the forehead with a golf club. I have a 9 inch scar on my leg from the time I fell on my broken Donald Duck bank when I was a child. I have a small scar on my back from the time I fell out of a tree hitting branches on the way down and landing on a log.
86. I always thought kids my own age were stupid. Whenever I went to a family party I'd always hang out with the adults and talk to them while they got drunk.
87. A coworker once sent me an e-mail by mistake trashing me to another coworker. They were conspiring to get me fired. I kept the e-mail and called them on it. They tried to say they were kidding. She eventually quit.
88. My Nana always told me I was her favorite in front of my other siblings. *preens*
89. Every year I bitch about having to go to the company Christmas party and every year I usually have fun. I also say I'm always going to have a date and then I can never find one in time.
90. I've been told by the best kisser I know that I'm the best kisser he knows. The trick is more lip, less tongue. Every guy always tells me I'm a great kisser so I've got that going for me.
91. I feel that touching elbows at a movie theatre with someone you have feelings for is more exhilarating than kissing someone you have no chemistry with.
92. I only like ice cream if it's totally filled or covered with stuff.
93. I don't actually have a cake fetish, despite the ongoing jokes and photos to the contrary.
94. I used to have terrible nightmares as a kid that I was being sucked out of my bunk-bed from my room; I could hear voices speaking to me through the fan in my bedroom.
95. I had exploratory surgery before my doctors realized I had kidney stones because they thought I had some kind of "gay" disease, despite the fact that I told them I'd never "gone all the way" with a guy.
96. I work about a 13 minute bike ride from my house but it takes me upwards of an hour and a half sometimes to get home via public transportation.
97. My first car seized up on the Mass Pike because it ran out of oil. A cab slammed on his breaks in the middle of the highway, which didn't have a breakdown lane to pick me up. He said I could go "anywhere" for free as a result and the state would reimburse the cab company. He suggested some place warm.
98. One of my most embarrassing moments was walking around my school for 3 periods with a pair of red underwear hanging out of the front of my pants. Earlier that morning I grabbed 2 pairs by mistake and stuffed one pair in the front of my pants so I'd remember to put them away when I got back to my room. My hands were full of hair products and a blow dryer and my brother was trying to get into the bathroom so I forgot to remove them. No one told me and I eventually noticed before 3rd period.
99. * this space was intentionally left blank *
100. I took my little brother and sister when they were kids to see Dorothy Parker and the Viscous Circle. They were bored and perplexed beyond belief.
101. I used to lie in bed when I was around 10 years old and wonder why I was on this earth. Was it a dream or was it real? And if it was real, what was my purpose.
102. I'm not sure there is anyone out there who can truly understand and accept me for who and what I am.
103. When I was a kid, I used the alarm on my remote controlled Knight Rider car to create mock-fire drills with my little brothers and sister. I think I'd seen one too many of those Bugs Bunny/Daffy Duck fire safety commercials; well that and I loved climbing out the second story window and climbing down the tree outside my bedroom. Hee.
104. I was friends with one of the finalists to be cast on Punky Brewster as Punky. She wasn't all that bitter about it since Punky was such a good-two-shoes. She was the first dark friend I had; she always wore Converse sneakers and black t-shirts, her name was Toni Freda. She was a transfer student from New York. I always thought she was the shit. She's come back into my life this year (2009) and we really need to get together!
105. I didn't speak to my mother from November 2004-May 2006 because she lied to me about voting for George Bush for re-election in 2004; She told me she voted for Gore but my brother set me straight. It wasn't so much that we'd spent hours talking about politics and she said she agreed with everything I said and voted for him anyway but the fact that I couldn't deal with lying to me.
106. I was the only person in the office who wasn't so thrilled about hiring my former assistant Kiki (Kayla), who turned out to be one of the greatest people I've ever met. She was so "fronting" to get the job despite the fact that I was trying to get her to loosen up so I could see if we had anything in common. This was the only time I was glad I'm glad my bosses didn't listen to me.
107. My former coworker Kayla and I had a secret drinking game about everyone in our office.
108. I have more in common (it seems) with older women than I do with most of my peers and best friends.
109. When my little brother passed out at my mother's remarriage ceremony I only glanced at him briefly then looked back to the ceremony, which went on uninterrupted and was all caught on film. They just dragged his lifeless body off camera.
110. I was a Big Brother in the Big Brother, Big Sister program for three years. My "little" was eventually taken into custody for locking his handicapped mother in her room for four days.
111. I broke my arm rollerblading when I was trying to dodge a trolley in traffic and I had to rollerblade (with said broken arm) to the emergency room because I couldn't find anyone to help me.
112. I am a freak about only being photographed from my left side. I have too many cow-licks on the other side of my head and I think I look better from the left. (There that should put that to rest, don't e-mail me thinking you're the only one to notice.)
113. I love the music scores to films. I own over a five hundred of them. They're great to rollerblade or bike to. It's like your own mini-soundtrack.
114. I broke up with my first boyfriend because he was fiercely jealous of my best friend who unbeknownst to me I was in love with.
115. I first fooled around with a guy, my first boyfriend in the Milner Hotel in Boston. I didn't do anything I was so freaked out. I was convinced the people at the desk knew we were going to have sex. Someone recently told me their dad was found dead in the same hotel.
116. I didn't go all the way with a guy until I was 24 (I think); he pretended he had cancer. The 2nd guy I ever went all the way with eventually became my roommate a couple of years later. He was the only guy I never used protection with until my last boyfriend and my ex fiance.
117. I add 25 things to this list every year. One of my ex-boyfriends got so jealous over this list because he didn't think I mentioned him enough that we fought about it for weeks.
118. I bought (my ex) Dennis a ring to ask him to marry me on his birthday but we were fighting so much I decided to just give it to him as a "promise ring". We broke up months later.
119. I love cheesy 80's love songs and 80's movies. I can watch a Breakfast Club all day long.
120. In the 3rd grade I refused to learn my multiplication tables because my parents were divorcing so the teacher called my parents into school for a conference.
121. The only time I ever free-balled it was when I wore just basketball shorts to the gym and I got an erection on the way home from all the bouncing going on down there. I literally had to hold my boner up to my body for like seven blocks so no one would see, I wasn't very successful.
122. I tried to kill myself twice as a kid and my mother never really noticed. I took poison from my chemistry set marked "fatal if swallowed" and mixed it with some orange juice. the second time I put gasoline on a salad and ate it, both times I just threw up for days and no one ever knew why.
123. An ex boyfriend of mine pretended he tried to kill himself and pretended he was medic-flighted to a hospital in Boston and then pretended he was on life support, all because I broke up with him. It turned out to be a lie and I didn't discover it until I called his best friend at work and she was like, "What are you talking about, he's in work today. I'm looking at him right now." I told her I never wanted to talk to him again and to pass that along.
124. I kept an ex-boyfriends toothbrush in my medicine cabinet for six months after we broke up because I really thought we'd work it out and be together some day. I eventually used it to clean the grout in my bathtub.
125. I've always wanted to be photographed as a dead merman, suffocating on dry land.
126. I've always wanted to do a series of photos of myself being pretend-dead after fake suicide attempts, i.e. bullet to the head, empty bottle of pills surround by broken glass, slashed wrists in a bloody tub, or a photograph of myself drown in a tub (my greatest fear is drowning).
127. I've never ever showered in a locker room in my lifetime.
128. I don't know how long my dick is despite people always asking me. My standard answer is "I don't measure it because I'm not in the 8th grade any more."
129. The first time I jerked off my best friend Jerry Peterson was in my basement playing video games with my little brothers. I excused myself for some reason and went to my room to jerk off. I didn't know what was happening but he almost walked in on me as I was orgasming. I seriously had no idea what cum was or what had happened but I liked it. I've been obsessed ever since.
130. In my mid twenties I used to come home from the gym and eat an entire Entenmanns's chocolate cake and my roommate Joel would give me the stink-eye as he was making stir fried veggies and chicken. Those days are over. Once you turn 30 it's all day hill.
131. If I died today within a year of break up with my ex boyfriend Dennis he would have gotten my condo since I hadn't changed my will.
132. I was hit by the short bus on my bicycle and knocked unconscious. A bystander who happened to have the same name as my stalker called my ex boyfriend (of two months) and told him I'd had an accident and to go to Boston Medical Center. My ex misunderstood and thought the stalker had tried to kill me. He rushed away from work an hour away to ask me to get back together with him in the hospital. I was so happy something so great came out of something so awful. We had the best sex ever that week. We broke up again a few months later.
133. My neighbor once hit me in the face with golf club at full swing. I called his mother a stupid bitch when she asked me what happened as I ran off blinded by the blood in my eyes. When I ran home my mother was locked in her bedroom drinking as I pounded on the door.
134. My little sister was hit by a mail truck when she was a kid.
135. My scariest moment was when I thought my sister had been kidnapped. She was actually in the woods with some kids fooling around with some boy who was friends with my brother Michael. I wanted to beat him senseless.
136. A friend's mother once told me I was a natural witch. My mom and my nana and I have always had extra sensory emotions. I can sometimes feel other people's emotions as if I'm experiencing them for myself.
137. I can quote the entire movie Mommie Dearest with accuracy from beginning to end.
138. I named my bike after Zombie Charity. a character on Passions.
139. I sent my coworker to my hair stylist and he gave her a really awesome cut. It looks a little like early Joan Jett. She'd look perfect wearing my white skull belt and Pumas.
140. I like telling random girl-clerks in clothing stores that I like their hair, outfit, etc. because it makes me happy to see them light up and there is no chance they'd stalk me.
141. My old roommate almost got arrested mistakenly for prostitution.
142. Someone once offered me $2500.00 to make a jerk off video for him. I turned him down.
143. I always get teary-eyed every year when I get my performance review at work and my boss says nice things about me. I always get teary-eyed when people say nice things about me. I. just. can't. handle. it.
144. My first best friend Michelle Bruce's mother had an affair and got pregnant so they sold their home and moved away. I was crushed. I only saw her once again after that when the baby was born.
145. I only weighed 103 pounds when I graduated college.
146. I've only had sex with one guy at a time, i.e. never any three-ways, orgies for me.
147. Two different people invited me to sex parties in the same week, this is the first time anyone has ever asked me that and it happened twice in the same week. I laughed both times and said, "Ummm…No."
148. I hate it when strangers come up to me and ask me if I'm the "Gary Jr." from the internet because I feel like such a tool to be revealing so many personal things about myself to total strangers.
149. I once got so mad at a friend I pulled my car over and told him to get out, when I went to turn around and go get him I back into a telephone phone and caused $1100.00 worth of damage.
150. Other than dying alone, my greatest fear is drowning. Ever since I almost drown as a kid because my mom wouldn't give me one of the 3 floaty rings she had and the undertow pulled me under.
151. My friend Andy named his kitten "Gary Jr. the third" after me. He wants me to send him child support.
152. I'm only acquaintances with someone I used to be like best friends with and every time I see him I feel sad because we had such a great connection.
153. I have three gay friends who've married women to stay in the country.
154. I dated a guy who offered to do "cheap" body work on my ex boyfriends car when we were still together. I had no idea he actually fancied me at the time but he actually wanted to help out my boyfriend because he meant so much to me, even though he liked me cuz he's just that nice of a guy.
155. Interestingly enough I never found volleyball all that interesting but now I think it's kind of sexy. It might be all the jumping around in loose shorts or the animalist grunting.
156. My old assistant's mom always bakes things and gives her two pieces each time, one for her and one for me. She always says, "and here's one for Gary."
157. My boss actually told me that the reason I don't have a boyfriend is because my legs are too white. Keep in mind he's a 55 year old straight Republican who goes hunting on the weekends. *gets out sun-tan lotion* (hey it can't hurt.) Actually the only logic I see in that is that I'll get skin cancer again and all the boys will throw themselves at me when I'm on my deathbed. They don't call me "day late-dollar short" for nothing.
158. I once drunkenly jerked off in bed while my best friend Jared was sleeping next to me in a hotel in New York city.
159. My former roommate Chris went upstairs to the jerk off room in a club in New York while I sat downstairs waiting for him.
160. I was once working out with my friend Marc and he sent me a text message to ask me if I was wearing any underwear. I was! I texted him back to ask him why he was checking out my dangly parts and showed him my waist band.
161. When I play Uno with friends I always want to make a wager on the game.
162. My mother cried all day when I got my ear pierced with my straight friends when I was in high school. She asked me what people would think. She said she couldn't be around me. So I took the earring off, put it in an envelope and slid it under her bedroom door. The next day she acted like nothing had happened.
163. I fell in love with the wallpaper in Anna's bedroom in the movie Birth so I googled the set decorator and found his cell phone number through his union. I called him as he was headed home from work. I told him I loved the set decoration in the movie and I wanted to know the name of the wallpaper in Anna's bedroom. He said he'd look it up no Monday and he'd call me back. It turns out it was sold in the showroom downstairs from me so I ordered it and had it installed within a month's time. I love it!
164. I had skin cancer twice in 2006 on my leg. I rarely if ever go out in the sun which is probably why I look so young. Make sure you wear your sunscreen!
165. I've only been to three concerts in my life. My first was Madonna, I was saving myself for her, my second was Nancy Sinatra, Jared dragged me. And I saw Madonna again in the summer of 2006 with Josh.
166. Most of my friend's and ex boyfriends names begin with "J", There's Jess, John, Joel, Josh, Jayson, Jason, and about 5 Jeffs, …or have double initials like me: GG, SS, NN, KK.
167. I was at my mother's High School graduation when she as 18, I had my own little cap and gown. My mother was the first pregnant girl to attend Woburn High School.
168. The first time I met my first boyfriend I just talked to him casually as they were closing--he said he'd be at the club the next week so I was so excited all week to go back and meet him the next week. As soon as I arrived I realized I forgot my ID. I begged the guy to let me in and he said no--so I drove home to get my ID and drove all the way back about 2 hours round trip. LOL. When I walked in and noticed him I pretended I was there the whole time. LOL.
169. My sister is married to a Republican Selectman.
170. I used to eat tuna fish for lunch every day until they started telling you that there are deadly amounts of mercury in the tuna.
171. When I was little I used to hide my aunt JB's car keys so she couldn't leave.
172. I often tear up when a boyfriend says something that makes me feel utterly happy and loved.
173. I collect antique Japanese woodblock prints. I have eleven of them.
174. I'm notorious for saving just about every little romantic scrap of memorabilia including receipts for special occasions, sugar packets, cocktail napkins and/or fortune cookie wrappers from the guys I care about, until we break up. Then I throw it all out. LOL.
175. I have a brown spot in my right eye but my eyes are blue.
176. My hair used to be super blond until I was around 11 years old and it turned light brown.
177. An ex boyfriend once bought me a universal international DVD player so he could buy me Family Guy on DVD in the United Kingdom before it came out here in the United States.
178. I have my Nana's last bottle of perfume in my bathroom apothecary cabinet.
179. I stole a bottle of holy water from the church at Notre Dame to bring home to my ex boyfriend Jeff's whose mom was dying. I never got to give it to him because she passed away.
180. My sharpest sense is hearing but I can't see worth a dam without my contacts in.
181. When I was a kid, I used to think that the phrase "Would you like to join me for a night cap?" meant "Would you like to have sex?"
182. My straight possession is Ray Bourgue's autograph. My Nana got it for me. I think he plays hockey right?
183. I've been drinking Myoplex protein shakes every day since 2004.
184. I have a severe sleep disorder, on a bad night I only get about an hour's sleep. My mind is always running and thinking.
185. My ex Josh got us really cheap seats to a Madonna concert one year--my obsession with being to the theater/concert early paid off in dividends. We were about 10 rows from the back--possibly some of the worst seats every in the huge Garden stadium but while we were waiting and I was eating my hot dog someone from the stadium came up to us and asked us if we'd like our seats upgraded. The few people who were also up there were fuming with curiousity. They moved us to the floor. Madge was like 15 feet from us--I was so happy and I couldn't get over how tiny she really is in person. LOL.
186. I was engaged to be married to a guy. I don't think I ever loved someone that freely or was ever that destroyed when it didn't work out. We broke up in October of 2007 over the telephone. He's tried to contact me at least seven times since and I can't bare to even think about him without becoming short of breath. I've been single since.
187. My sister and my brother both have newborns. Someone needs to invent an emotion to combine jealousy and complete happiness because that's how I feel when I look at them.
188. Politics are a huge turn on me for. If you can tell me why Hillary's healthcare plan was better than Obamas or list at least 10 reasons why GW should be impeached--I'll totally fantacize about having babies with you.
189. I gave my sister away on her wedding day. I held it together pretty well until they opened those doors and everyone stood up for the bride march--I thought my eyes would spray out of my head I felt so emotional. I almost passed out right there at the end of the aisle.
190. My brother who lived in Alaska for several years--now lives in Mississippi--my other brother lives in California with my newphew Ember Sky. My mom sold our house and moved to South Carolina. Even though I never really saw them when they lived here--I miss them all the more knowning they're NOT close by.
191. We had a fire drill in my condo complex last year at 3am. I thought it was another drill until I opened the door and noticed the hallways were filled up with smoke. I never felt so confused or scared.
192. I almost adopted a Guatemalan baby when a friend of my sister's aborted their planned adoption with the baby. My ex-fiance wasn't ready so we held off. I'm more than a little upset about the fact that I could be a dad right now if we'd broken up sooner.
193. I ditched my Tivo for two Comcast DVRS with four burners going. I watch so much TV that some days both DVRs are full.
194. I was never a dog or cat person but my ex-fiance had two chocolate cocker spaniels. When we broke up I considered offering him $5000.00 for both dogs as an offer he couldn't refuse but I decided to get my own chocolate cocker instead--he looks identical to Nico and Naya my exes dogs. i sense some people think that's creepy but I have to say it was oddly comforting but not the reason I wanted a chocolate one.
195. My dog Cappy Channing Creighton Capwell is named after the gay Capwell child on the old soap opera Santa Barbara. The character who was accidentally murdered by his own amnesiac mother (who was disguised in male drag at the time with a full beard) kicked off the premiere of the show. Ironically my life was in transition when I got Cappy and when I first started watching the show--both the dog and the show possibly saved me from falling into a very very very dark place from which I may not have escaped. How's that for soap opera dramatic?
196. With the exception of my mortgage--I've been debt free since 1998.
197. I made peace with my mother despite some of the unforgivable things she's done to me in the past. When I used to think about her I had an image of me standing beside her while she washed the dishes after work. I would do or say anything I could think of to get her to engage in a conversation with me. I was desperate for her to throw me any morsel of acceptance, understanding or love. When I thought of her I felt that despair. When I think of her now--I think about baking gingerbread men and pressing the m&m eyes and buttons onto the cookies. Or when she embraced my ex-fiance like he was her own son. We've come a long way.
198. Since my sister had baby Guytano--I haven't felt as close to her since we were kids.
199. One of my closest confidants is someone I've only met in person once. We converse just about every day via e-mail and I find comfort and safety in the fact that no matter what I do--what happens to me--or what kind of trouble I get into emotionally, financially, physically or spiritually he will be there to support me.
200. Two of my closest friends moved away last year but I know in my heart they'll be back.
201. I've only really had one black friend in my life--and we lost touch when I graduated from college. I still search for him on Facebook every month or so.
202. My Grampy died the same day the music died (February 3rd).
203. I once saw some teenage punk push and old Asian woman down and overturn her shopping cart of bottles she was collecting for the deposit-money so I chased him about 11 blocks in my tuxedo shoes. I'm not sure what I was going to do to him when I caught up with him but I did have vengeance in mind. When I went back to help her pick them up she was terrified but didn't speak English.
204. I made a 25 page scrap book for my first boyfriend cutting things out of magazines, books and photos of all the things that reminded me of us for Christmas because I didn't have a lot of money. It was probably one of the best gifts I've ever given.
205. My second boyfriend ever mailed me a fake bomb with a note "If I can't have you no one can" as a joke. It took me a few years to get the joke but the guy is just so damn lovable.
206. I had a recurring dream that an ex boyfriend would get into a car crash--he later confided in me that he was having the same recurring dream. A week after I told him I also was having the same dream--he crashed his car and broke his leg.
207. I worked in a club for 6 months when i was 24 but quit when the management became suspicious that I was a narc (I wasn't).
208. I was terrified of drag queens until I had to work the door with the queen of mean drag queens Mizery (who turned out to be one of the nicest guys I met working in the club), Ivana Bump and Sabina Babaganush (both of whom have two of the gentlest spirits of anyone I've ever met).
209. I once photographed myself naked covered in sheet cake in an homage to the TV movie about bulimia starring Meredith Baxter Birney as a joke for some friend--I've never lived it down.
210. My best friend Joel gave me a binder of porn on DVD yesterday (7/30/2009) because I've never actually seen one, even though someone sent me a skateboarder porno as a gag gift some years ago. I'm not sure if I'm going to look at it.
211. My little sister is my closest sibling and one of my best friends but I'd never tell her that.
212. I became great friends with someone over our mutual love of Robin Mattson (of Santa Barbara fame).
213. I got to know my second boyfriend in a bar because my roommate was flirting with his gay friend. The straight guy asked me if I wanted to hang out some time so I said sure, since I had no straight friends. Unbeknownst to me--he was questioning his sexuality and the first time we hung out solo he asked if he could kiss me and the rest is history.
214. I took three years of Italian in High School because I love Italian food but I regret not taking Spanish because I know so many Brazilian/Spanish people and they always want to know if I speak Portuguese (which I guess is close enough to Spanish to get by).
215. Sometimes I scratch the scar on my leg until it bleeds.
216. I always dry myself with a fresh towel every time I shower but I'm obsessed with energy/water conservation.
217. I'm really jealous of people who can wear hats because I can't wear them because my head is too small. The only hat I have is one that I got from my aunt. I once wore my younger cousin's cap all day and "accidentally wore it home". He called me the next day asking for his hat back but I said, "I thought you said I could keep it?" And he begrudgingly said I could. But I told him I was just kidding and sent it back the next day. The following day my aunt FedExed me a new hat, the same "kids size" cap her son had.
218. My aunt Shirley was the first person I told was gay. She was wholeheartedly accepting and has been my champion ever since.
219. One of my biggest regrets in life is not going to Joel's mom's funeral/wake. Aside from the fact that Joel is my best friend-- his mom offered me great comfort the day my mother threw me out of her life for being gay and told me what a miserable life I would be leading as a result.
220. I sometimes talk to my dog Cappy in a fake French accent or Southern drawl--ya'll. Heck I've even been known to bust into the voice of Glomer from the Punky Brewster cartoon.
221. The second thing I ever stole in my life was a Cadbury Egg because the store owed me a dollar in the form of a coupon my friend yantch forgot to scan at the check-out counter--that coupled with the fact that the damn egg would not scan at the register when I was doing the self-check out.
222. I was never a dog person so if you told me a couple of years ago I would be working in a doggie daycare facility--I'd say you were mad! Mad I tells ya!
223. For the first time in my life I have four best friends, not including my dog. I'd have to say Joel is my number one since we've been friends for 16 years but if a bus were barreling down on one, while the other was tied to the nearest railroad tracks with an oncoming train racing towards him and the third was in a burning building and I could only save one, I don't know what I'd do! JJDA
224. I have my own fake TV show starring myself and my best friend yantch--so far we HAVEN'T filmed five whole seasons, it's called yantch&JUNIOR and it's available for exclusive viewing on Facebook in My Notes section. Make sure you read them in order--it is serialized.
225. My Grampa past away this spring and for the first time since I can remember, I had some true friends rally around me. It felt really great to be loved and supported like that. I hope those friends never fade or go away.